My Journey Home

My Life. Beautiful, Ugly, Unfiltered.

Tag Archives: active parenting

producing well rounded children

As parents, I believe it is our responsibility to create in our children a sense of curiosity and to immerse them in all facets of culture (even ones we don’t “prefer”) in order to produce well rounded, adjusted teenagers and adults.

Your children are going to be the adults of tomorrow, and it is up to you to educate them!

It seems to me that many parents have lost touch with a very important role that they play.  Many parents are  so busy that they have neglected not only helping to develop their children’s spiritual beliefs, but also enabling them to carry on a decent conversation because of their lack of knowledge on subjects.

When I was a teenager, I remember being drug taken to many different concerts, sporting events, and basically any kind of cultural experience my parents could get their hands on.  Many weekends  friends of my parents would come over and cook authentic Mexican food, while teaching me how to merengue! I spent a full summer one year traveling the Eastern United States with my grandparents in their motor home, stopping at every Bluegrass Festival along the way to jam with their many friends.  My brother is a very talented athlete and therefore I spent countless hours at the gym watching him play basketball, and also race motocross.

Our society is so plugged in to Facebook, TV, and our cell phones that we don’t have time for actual experiences any more.  When was the last time you turned all of these things off and actually immersed yourself in the present moment?  Actually enjoyed a day with your family without checking your email, text messages or voicemail?  By not being able to do this, we are becoming, and also producing children and teenagers that are socially retarded.  They would rather text you than talk to you.  If they do talk to you, they have trouble keeping eye contact and speaking without mumbling or using slang,  because they feel insecure and vulnerable when not hiding behind a screen.

We have to wake up… we have to educate….If we don’t teach our children while they are in our homes, someone else will when they leave your home and go off to college, or a job.  I for one would much rather have my child know have a knowledge of many different subjects, and be firm in knowing what she believes when she is faced with the real world and it’s views.

Don’t you agree?


great expectations

I know I have mentioned (several times) my new found struggles with Astaire and her tantrums….but I have a happy update today!  We are making some progress.  I have found over the past several days and trips out, that if I set her up for what we are about to do, and clearly state my expectations, we are all much happier and she does so well!

An example of what I might say would go something like this as we are walking in to the store, church, or even a playdate:

“Astaire, we are going to go in to __________ now.  Mama expects you to be a good girl, be obedient and (sit in the cart/go to your class and play with your friends/share your toys) without getting upset.   If you don’t, you will get a time-out, do you understand? (she will say yes) You are such a  big girl, and you are going to a great job!”

We go in, and sometimes she needs a little reminding—but a reminder is usually all she needs.  We have had several successful trips this week, including one to the zoo! She did absolutely wonderful all day, with zero meltdowns and she even got to feed a giraffe right out of her hand….TWICE!

how a toddler says happy mothers day.

My little lady is a constant blessing to me, and I know how much she loves me- but today she had a little help from her Daddy in making me feel very special for the day.

Yesterday they snuck away into Josh’s office to do some work… Astaire was very excited because the office is the only “no zone” in the house, and she was allowed in there for a better part of an hour.  I never once heard a peep from either of them…and I’m sure she had a great time- I have pictures to prove it.

The final product was this beautiful handmade card- which is going straight into the memento storage container in the garage for safe keeping.  I’m totally a hoarder of things like this.

This morning I found myself in such an incredible mood, and I realized it was because I was able to wake up, get a shower, hair and makeup all done without interruption. Don’t get me wrong, and I know you won’t– I love her, but man…that time was precious!  Little did I know, they had been calling me from downstairs because they had prepared this breakfast, that I had to eat literally running out the door for church because I took my sweet time getting ready (oops)  I did however take the time and let Astaire show me and read to me her card…as you can see she was so proud and excited to show it to me.  Isn’t it crazy that at this age already she knew she had made it and that it was for me?  She is too sweet.

I just can’t close this post out without saying thank you to my wonderful husband, yet again, for everything he does to continue to make my life wonderful…including today.  It means so much that he found it important enough to take time out to teach Astaire the importance of honoring her mother today— I really appreciate it so much.  I love you babe!

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team thomforde style

Our recent nomination for Top 25 Style Blogs from Circle of Moms has really got me thinking- my wardrobe needs a major overhaul.  The only fashionista living in this house is my little lady, but she works it enough for the both of us.


Though trends may come and go, the one thing that never goes out of style is being a good parent.

One thing I am so thankful for is my husband Josh.   He is cool and comfortable enough with himself that in our home there are no gender roles when it comes to parenting, or getting things done.  This allows us both much more quality time with each other and with our daughter, and is teaching her several important lessons.

1) Daddy doesn’t put anything else before Mama and Astaire. We are number #1

2) There is no “woman’s place” or “man’s place”.  She can do anything in the world.

3) Teamwork, Teamwork, Teamwork!

One of our more low key days might go something like this:

Astaire the Alarm wakes us at 6:45, and Daddy gets up with her to have Daddy/Daughter time eating breakfast and watching Toons while Mama gets a few extra minutes of sleep.

Around 730 I get up so Josh can shower, he leaves at 815 to work from 9-6.  During those hours, Astaire and I clean the bathrooms, do laundry, dishes and vacuum/mop the floors.  We also play outside, eat lunch, (she) takes a nap, she has lots of snacks  and we probably watch another cartoon or two.

When Josh gets home, I’m in the middle of making dinner, cause I like it to be hot when we eat, so he takes Astaire to get a diaper change, and they fold and put away the rest of the laundry.  We eat dinner, and then head back outside. Josh mows the back yard while I play with Astaire in the front yard.  By then, she is wanting daddy again, so we switch, and they clean out the cars together while I mow the front yard.  When we finish, we all play in the yard together.

After about 30 minutes it’s time for Astaire’s bedtime snack and bath.  We go inside get a snack, Josh takes Astaire and does the bath, while I clean up the kitchen from dinner.  When they finish, we both read her bedtime stories, say her prayers and tuck her in “nigh nigh”.

Then it’s finally time to sit down and relax.

I know this isn’t conventional, I know some Judgy Judgingtons will probably think I make him do too much.  That it’s my job to take care of the home, kids, cooking and cleaning.   Well I welcome your comments- because the truth is, it’s much more important that he do these things and have a relationship with his daughter than it is he have a relationship with our couch and flat screen.  I don’t make him do any of this.  He wants to, he loves to, we both do.  It’s our team–Team Thomforde.

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